I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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