he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I have feelings that need drinking.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
