Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Randomize
