If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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