i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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