Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
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