thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
