the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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