I'm lost and stupid without you.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
