After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
