You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Randomize
