we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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