Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
People with herpes should wear stickers.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
