we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Randomize
