You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
We left the knife in your bed.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
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