Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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