Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Randomize