Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Randomize
