so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I FOUND THE LEGS
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
