And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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