I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
