do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize