this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
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