Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize