with your own penis?
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
