New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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