I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize