Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
