she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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