Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
