I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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