Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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