i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
