So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
