margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Everclear isn't food dammit
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
