Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
