is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
