I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize