I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
