He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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