just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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