just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize