God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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