i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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