I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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