Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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