Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
