just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I'm determined to sit on that face.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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