the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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