Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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