if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
